you're reading...
creativewritingink, short stories, writing competitions

Now and Then

photo-nic-co-uk-nic-224375-1024x682.jpgIn five years’ time when he’s standing at the front of a church he’s never set foot in before, waiting for  the vicar to nod at the organ player to begin the opening bars of The Arrival of the Queen of Sheba, he will be thinking of her.

But she won’t be the one about to walk through those heavy oak doors.

In eight years’ time, when he’s standing at the ‘tidy end’ of the hospital bed and his first born’s body slithers out between the splayed and shaking legs of his wife after she’s screamed obscenities he’s never heard her use before, he will hear a soft voice at the back of his mind telling him that everything will work out for the best.  That if things are meant to be, then they will be.

In fifteen years’ time when he’s curled up against the rubber wheel of a four-by-four in a street younger than his third child, his head pounding in time with his heart and vomit pooled around mud-spattered boots, he will see the light of her smile as she tells him he can’t hold his drink any more than he can hold a decent tune.  Their drunken laughter is infectious, joyous, like the fairground music of that merry-go-round they’d sat beside.

In nineteen years’ time, when he reads the list of reasons he can’t be a husband anymore, and the dates of contact he’s permitted to see his four children, he will feel the stab of failure almost as acutely as he felt the piercing helplessness seeing her packed bags the night they said goodbye.

In twenty-three years’ time he will be walking through the same square in Paris and he will look for the café and the fairground and the scooters and the laughter soaking the golden stones of the buildings, and he will see the table.

He will see a couple sitting at the table; their hands clasped across the surface of it and their eyes locked.  He will want to go to them and tell them to stay. Or to go.  But to do these things together.  He will want to tell them to forget promises they may have made to other people and to trust and have faith in the way they are both feeling now.  Right now.  Or they might spend the rest of their lives with only memories and regrets.

written for the www.creativewritingink prompt of 23rd March, 2017


About debscooper

I read, I write, I tweet, I blog and I avoid housework whenever I can.


6 thoughts on “Now and Then

  1. Beautiful. So poignant. Pretty sure it will be another winner. Well done Debs.

    Liked by 1 person

    Posted by carole925 | March 28, 2017, 3:44 pm
  2. That’s very kind of you, Carole. Glad you liked it. I’ve been in a bit of a writing ‘fug’ lately – nothing seems to flow – this was so short I was convinced it was rubbish :/


    Posted by debsriccio | March 28, 2017, 5:03 pm
  3. Really liked the structure you gave to this story. Well done on your win.

    Liked by 1 person

    Posted by colettecoen | May 5, 2017, 3:12 pm
  4. A great idea, and beautifully expressed


    Posted by auberonkain | May 11, 2017, 6:54 am

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


I tweet-twoo

%d bloggers like this: